It’s that time of year folks. I don’t mean back to school time – although the girls do start tomorrow thus ending my free time. What I mean is allergies. They’re ba-ack. And they seem a might pissed off. I’ve tried Claratin. I’ve tried the neti-pot for a more natural route per Doctor Oz’s instructions. It made me feel all whole foods and new aged, but I’ve still got snot dripping from my nose and that wicked disturbing sensation of a hairball lodged in the back of my throat so I don’t think it was effective.
I’m not sure the non-affected realize how annoying it is for those of us who constantly sniff like a coke whore. Yes, it’s bothersome to those of you who have to hear it, but we’re even closer to the source. Take your bothersomed-ness and multiply it 4,000. And then stick it up your butt. WE CAN’T HELP IT. It’s either sniff, blow, or you see snot dribble out of our noses.
That happened to me once you know. The snot dribbling. During an interview to be a Resident Advisor in college. I’m pretty sure it was the reason I didn’t get the job. I just wasn’t quick enough with the ever present tissue and there it went, rolling out of my nose and over my upper lip and my interviewer stared in horror and then so obviously tried to disguise the fact that she’d been staring at me in horror by going back to her interview notes and saying, “So… ummm…. Yeah…. You want to be an RA why exactly?” I was all suave with the, “Seasonal allergies. What you gonna do? I want to be an RA for the free room.”
So… ummm…. Yeah. Seasonal allergies pretty much suck and I have yet to find a medication that helps 100%. Most days I cope and keep my eye on the calendar. This will end at the end of September. If I can just. Hold. Out. *gasp* But most days I pretty much realize why people with chronic anything get depressed and commit suicide.
In lieu of flowers please send tissues.